Chapter 2

Grace and Hope

James finally woke up in a very somber state of mind after that emotionally torn, yet peaceful night.  He had the thought of pulling the window shades, so he did that for the first time in many months.  As the sunlight came into the room, James felt a sense of warmth in the light that beamed through the window.

He fumbled into the kitchen and make him some toast.  As He flipped though his bible he drank some juice, he knew that he had experienced something very powerful that he had never experienced before.

Then he spoke out loud, "God, I don't want to live like this anymore...I can't mentally handle this life."  His words seemed to be reaching out for something tangible and real. He had been isolated in his apartment for many months only going out for groceries. Even that was a bit much for him.   He alienated from his family and his church.

James had had his share of difficult times when he couldn't take the mental anguish any longer. Those unbearable nights always seemed to push him over the edge into a breakdown.  He always reached for some kind of sanity that he could find within himself, that certain voice he heard always seemed to urgently plead for him to get help. 

He felt this time was no different. James had no choice but to run away to find a safe haven in someone who would give him solace. He felt like a nobody because the evil voices wanted him to isolate and control him, but he could not get out of their grasp and verbal control. 

He spoke to God earnestly, "Where can I go this time?"

At first, he thought his apartment was haunted. But as He eventually discovered that the same voices followed him wherever he went.  Moving on from one hurt to another, drove his raging emotions over the edge.  Same voices different scenario...

James once more bent down on his knees, "Thank you, Father in Heaven, for the awesome way you came into my room last night. I could actually feel the breath of the demons and hear them chant over me" James prayed.  

"Last night I felt a different presence in his bedroom. A different voice among all the verbal torment.  

 "I had to cry out no matter what and you heard my cry," James bowed his hand to the floor. 

The angels of Hope and Grace were there, and held him close that morning as He felt a peace that he had never felt.

"He has experienced the first of many breakthroughs," the angel grace softly spoke as she placed her hand upon James's head. 

Hope agreed with her, "Someday James will have a full and abundant life. For now, the battles will be intense for him. He needs these times of rest and refreshing.

All of the sudden James took a deep breath as He experienced an even deeper peaceful moment in time.

As He did, the Holy Spirit dropped a scripture into his mind. 

 James reached for His Bible as he thumbed through the pages.  

"Nothing will separate you from the love of God." 

"Nor height or depth or angels or demons will separate you from the Love of God" as James read aloud.

The presence of the Lord was in their midst. The angels of the Lord that remained in his room worshiped. 

Hope noticed James was in tears. "Grace...look at James." 

Grace looked up from worshiping from her kneeled position and whispered in his ear as Hope and grace surrounded James as he raised his hands to heaven.  

James looked up and surrendered to the presence of God. 

He felt a peace unlike he had not experienced before.  He kneeled down on his bedroom floor and sobbed at waves of peace rolled over his like waves. 

The remaining demons of hopelessness and suicide faded into the distant midst awaiting further instructions...